Beth Lawrence

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in Foster Care· Journal

More of Them, Less of Me

May 5, 2014

Parenting a third child is doing the work of teaching me greater selflessness. Denying myself becomes necessary to keep everyone clean and fed and hugged. I’m working on being thankful for that. But right now, I just want a little time to myself. 

Jesus, help me approach and view and respond to my children the way you do. My biggest fear in life these days is that I will parent them in such a way that it will hinder their love for you, and others. Help me strike a balance between discipline and affection, accountability and mercy. Overcome my failures as a parent. In fact, overshadow me completely and become irresistible to them. May they hunger and thirst for you. Be their bread of life. Their living water. 

We’ve had Jase for nearly four weeks. What a precious baby he is. But the rest of my life hasn’t slowed one bit in order for me to care for him. In fact, it’s been years since I lived at this pace. I’m in constant motion from before 7am until after 9pm. It’s not that the work is to heavy, just so constant. 

Titus and Anna have been wonderful helpers since he arrived. They adore him. 

I take him to visit his mother today. Help me to minister to her. To cheer her on even though her success means my profound heartache. May I live your love and leave the results to you. 

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